Due to various other obligations, I'm not able to update the Wrestling Section of Vintage Blogs as much as I used to. One of the losses of that came from my lack of time were no more weekly reviews for the two major television shows. However, that's about to change, because of my friend, JD, from Wackbag. He has graciously allowed me to post his reviews (from Wackbag's wrestling section) on here.
JD's reviews are always entertaining, insightful and provide more laughs than any of mine ever did. I would like to thank JD for allowing me to post his reviews, and I hope you enjoy them as much as I do.
This is his review for the January 24th edition of Monday Night Raw.
- Starting the show off with Edge is always good. I love his reaction to the chime signifying there's a new e-mail from the "anonymous" GM. I do hope that we'll eventually find out who it is. Swagger, Tyson Kidd, & Drew McIntyre? None of these guys should be #40 at the Rumble. I've got this feeling that it's going to be 'Taker, HHH, or Kane. I'd love it if Edge just speared Cole through the GM stand.
- Okay, so they're keeping the shitty Nexus song for Punk's version of the group? Should have stayed with Punk's Killswitch Engage entrance music. I find it mildly amusing, there's only 1 member of the original Nexus in the group...maybe they should have gotten a different name too? So Batista Jr has a name, Mason Ryan...and it's another British voice in Nexus from Cardiff, Wales. I guess they didn't want the faction to bee too UK-centric. I've always thought it'd be amusing to put all the guys from the UK (or British territories) and call it The Empire; put William Regal in as the head.
- Really? They're spelling it "The Corre" Fuck you, there's only one R in Core and I'm going to spell it as such. Barrett vs. Punk will be a good match. I dislike the "if you lose, your group is out of the Rumble" stipulation. Of course Cena's the special guest ref...I foresee a double countout or a double DQ.
- These ads for "I Am Number Four" look pretty interesting. Is it based off a graphic novel or something?
Aizaz's Note - To answer JD's question "I AM Number Four" is based on a novel. I haven't personally read it but as I was browsing through Barnes and Nobles, I saw it the other day.
- Morrison & Henry vs. Del Rio & Sheamus...I expect Sheamus to be eliminated by HHH at the Rumble. He won't be in the match, but he'll run out and yank Sheamus from the ring or attack him on the ramp on the way to the ring. Kind of surprised to see Henry tap to end the match, I assumed they'd continue to push the nonsensical belief that he's actually a threat to win the Rumble.
- Snatch match for the Divas title...when did Melina go back to being a heel? Or is she just a tweener right now? Why am I even caring? Interesting submission maneuver by Melina, looked like some sort of weird octopus stretch. WOW, that was an unreal-bendy Sharpshooter. Pulled Melina's legs right up over her head. You know she's probably that bendy in bed too. Oh joy, a 2-on-1 handicapped match at the Rumble for the Divas title. WGAS
- I liked that video package they did for Mason Riley's introduction to Nexus. What the fuck's with him speaking Welsh though? I always thought it was a phlegm-y language, but damn skip.
- Glad Cena pointed out the retardedness of the extra R...and definitely liked his Shining reference to seeing Miz & Riley laughing. Cole went exceptionally over the top with his cock-suckery of Miz when he came out to the ring. Ziggler out for commentary, Vickie looking not un-fuckable. Decent match, shame that the commentary takes away from it. That's one thing that I definitely miss about JR, he could get a guy over on commentary without having to be over-the-top with gay bias like Cole. "No coming in the back door for me!" Um...Dolph if this show was still TV-14 King would have jumped on that line like a bitch in heat. No shock that it ends w/ a run in.
- "Every cloud has a silver lining." Does it Wade? That's some impressively shitty cliche usage
- Damn, those leopard-print outfits are drool-inducing on the Bellas. Not a fan of Alicia Fox with the Kool-Aid red hair...doesn't look good on her at all. And what's up with her tits, did she get a reduction or something? They don't look anywhere near as big as before. Maybe it's just the top she's wearing. Lame match, lamer ending. I'm sure it's going to wind up with the Bellas actually feuding and boring all of us. Or we see the triumphant return of TV-MA Raw and they do a threesome angle. Haha, he's with Gail Kim, nice! First time she's been on TV in a long while. I love how she pointed out that the Bellas were basically up shits creek with no more guest hosts.
- Miz & Ziggler vs. Rated RKO this Friday on Smackdown...that could be nice, but you know it's just going to end up as a schmozz and just be a shit match with Cole sucking Miz's cock all match long.
- Harris & McGillicutty vs. Santino & Kozlov for the tag titles. I could see them putting the titles on Nexus and then having them feud with 1/2 of Core for the straps. I like Husky's near snap-bodyslam, bringing Santino up and over so quickly. Weak having Kozlov be completely destroyed by one knock off the apron, but I like Harris' finisher. Wait, it wasn't for the titles? Stupid Cole fucking it up. Oh well, I'm sure that either they or the Core will get the tag titles soon and feud over it.
- Fine tossing out Nexus & Core, lame taking so damned long to do it. Instead of just getting the match on, it's a lame filler. Excessive use of profanity for a double DQ? You knew the GM was going to overturn that decision. Meh, as expected...time to delete
Thanks for reading!
Comment if you like, we would really appreciate it if you do.
If you need to contact us for any reason, telling us how great we are, asking us some questions, making suggestions, or even complaining, just e-mail me at firstname.lastname@example.org
Oh and visit Wackbag, it's one of the funniest boards in the interwebz, I would know since I'm a member as well.