Sunday, June 20, 2010

Into the Wrestling Vault: Father's Day Edition

Both Johnny C and I have made our hatred and dismay over the Linda McMahon induced PG-Era and overall state of wrestling well known. We firmly believe that wrestling was far better in the 90's and early 2000's. In fact, even the mid 2000's are much better than the horseshit that is shoved down our throats these days. Consequently, it's no surprise that I have burned countless number of hours looking up old matches, and promos on Youtube, Daily Motion, and the dozens of other websites which host wrestling videos. Now that I have turned myself into a fancy man (with my own blog) I figured to turn all those wasted hours into blog posts. So join me as I delve into the Wrestling Vault to relive my favorite videos.

Happy Father's Day, everyone! If you are lucky enough to have a good relationship with your father, then go out and celebrate the day with him. Go watch a baseball game, drink some beer, maybe fish. Shit, just do something the two of you enjoy doing together. For those of you who are big enough scumbags to put your father in a nursing home.... I say go fuck yourselves, but please do find time in your "busy" schedules to visit your father.

Those of who don't have such a good relationship with your father, we have got you covered on this Father's Day. Most sites will have some kind of touchy, heart warming story of parental love. However, on Vintage Blogs, we shit all over these Pursuit of Happiness moments. In honor of Father's Day, we bring you a father who will make your issues with daddy seem trivial. Sure, the old man might have belted you one too many times, but at least he didn't make you kiss his ass on a national stage. If you are a woman (What in fuck's name are you doing on a wrestling site?) just consider yourself happy that daddy didn't give you bruises all over your body a couple of days before your wedding. If you haven't figured it out by now, we are talking about VINCENT KENNEDY MCMAHON!

What I said above is all true, at Wrestlemania 22 Shane McMahon was forced to kiss his father's ass on a national stage. Think about that, Shane found out somewhere in the back that he would kiss his father's ass on the grandest stage of them all. The next time you decide to bitch and moan about your old man just think about that....Whatever else he may have said or done, he never made you kiss his ass. The Stephanie McMahon bruises story is true as well. In storyline, Vince and Steph were feuding on Smackdown and it would culminate in a match on a PPV. In real life, Stephanie was set to get married to her fiance, Paul Levesque aka Triple H. After her match, Daddy's Little Princess, had bruises all over her body on her wedding.....No awkwardness during that wedding night! Oh and if that wasn't enough, Vince McMahon actually forced his daughter to stop wearing a bra when she came out on TV. But there's more.... Vincent Kennedy McMahon actually proposed an angle involving incest with his daughter. The plan called to have Steph and Triple H's kid revealed to be a byproduct of incest between Vince and Steph. There is some wholesome family entertainment for you.

The lesson: Thank whatever deity you believe in that Vincent Kennedy McMahon isn't your father.

Now on to the videos.

The first match is Shane McMahon vs Vincent McMahon at Wrestlemania X-Seven. Lot of lovely family memories here.

The second one is the aforesaid match between Vincent McMahon and his daughter Stephanie McMahon. Because nothing says "I love you" to your daughter more than choking her.

Happy Fathers Day!

Thanks for reading!

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