Sunday, May 23, 2010

Over The Limit Preview

First of, this preview is going to be shorter than usual, because A) This PPV has nothing that really excites me and B) The 4 1/2 hours series finale of Lost is on, so I won't be watching. Johnny C might come along and do a preview, but I don't know what his lazy ass is up to, so don't hold your breath.

Tonight another WWE PPV is upon us: the debuting Over the Limit. In May of 1999, Owen Hart tragically died at a PPV titled "Over the Edge." I'm not the only person who is disturbed by this eerily similar name, and I don't agree that WWE should have adopted it. Nonetheless, one can only hope Aizaz meets his demise soon so the rest of society can be spared from listening to him. This "lazy ass" was busy working at KYW, putting food on the table, while Zazzy G was collecting Taliban stamps and preparing his TiVo for LOST. Without further adieu, let's ring the bell!

By work, he means sitting on his ass, getting drunk as usual (keep those Irish stereotypes alive), watching SNL and chatting with me. I shouldn't complain too much, since he actually wrote something on here, which is about as rare as a question getting answered on Lost.

Eve (C) vs. Maryse
(Divas Championship)
Aizaz - They have actually done a pretty decent job of building this match up as Maryse and Eve have traded vicious (Diva standards) attacks back and forth. Of course, the build up won't actually help the match, since neither one of the Divas is really capable of carrying a match. Keep it short, and as painless as possible.

Predicted Winner - Maryse

Johnny C - Still protesting against the absurd firing of Mickie James; therefore, I refuse to put any effort in covering WWE "divas' wrestling." I pick Maryse to win back her title.

Winner: Maryse

Ted DiBiase w/Virgil vs. R-Truth
Aizaz - I'm shocked that a midcard feud involving DiBiase Jr and Truth actually made it on to a PPV. I guess they are really behind DiBiase and the rumored Fortunate Sons stable (with Brett DiBiase's surgery and Carlito's release, I wonder how they are going to proceed with that). However, I don't see that translating into a victory for Ted on this PPV, since I expect Virgil to cost the younger DiBiase this match.

Predicted Winner - R-Truth

Johnny C - Both superstars are picking up momentum in this fresh storyline which is exciting to watch. DiBiase has developed a persona: the spawn of the Million Dollar Man. It's original, creative, and real. Thus, it equals money. His pursuit of a manservant has been fun to watch, considering he seeks out minorities such as the recently "shitcanned" Carlito and R-Truth. R-Truth has gained popularity by sticking up for himself and reprimanding DiBiase for attempting to buy the proud rapper. For some funny reason, WWE has brought VIRGIL out of the dustballs to resume his duties of guarding DiBiase men. Although Aizaz predicts a face turn by Virgil, I predict a decisive victory by DiBiase with some "resourceful help" from the original "Big Daddy V."

Winner: Ted DiBiase

Aizaz - I predicted a face turn for Virgil, because I see Michael Tarver becoming the next Virgil

Kofi Kingston vs. Drew McIntyre (C)
Intercontienental Championship)
Aizaz - Why? Why do they continue torturing me with the Jizzbucket known as Drew McIntyre? He is so fucking boring. If they had this "Chosen One" storyline with someone else, I would have been excited, but McIntyre is such a charismaless fuck that I simply don't care. I'm picking Kofi to win, because of my hate for Drew. Wow, I'm really mailing this preview in.

Predicted Winner - Kofi Kingston

Johnny C - One of the most confusing, pointless storylines of all time. Drew was stripped of the championship, fired, brought back, and rewarded his title back within one week. Kofi won a tournament to win the stripped title, but was forced to surrender the gold back despite never being defeated. If this consulted atrocity was simply to give this match a reason to happen, then I implore every fan to NOT order the PPV due to the stupidity of WWE. I agree with Aizaz about Drew, he has no charisma, no personality, and no reason to be respected. The "Chosen One" storyline could work as it has in the past with The Rock as "The Corporate Champion;" however, Drew lacks the "it" factor that WWE boasts about its superstars possessing. Kofi's star burnt out after his Orton feud, so I doubt he takes the win tonight. Unfortunately, Drew will retain by any means necessary.

Winner: Drew

Hart Dynasty (C) vs Miz and Jericho aka Jiz
(Unified Tag Team Championship)

Aizaz - I don't know if I mentioned this before, but I'm worried for the Hart Dynasty. Jiz is so much more charismatic and interesting than the current champions that they will completely overshadow them unless they continue using Bret as a mouthpiece. Seeing as how that's not going to happen (Bret's deal runs out soon) I think Jiz will not only overshadow the Hart Dynasty, they will capture their titles as well. That's probably the best thing for this feud going forward, since the fans are much more likely to get behind a face team that is trying to get their titles back after being screwed out of them. Also, it gives Jericho and Miz the opportunity to appears on Smackdown.

Predicted Winner - Jericho and Miz aka Jiz

Johnny C - Finally, a tag team title match worth watching! This is actually a dream match for me; both teams are excellent wrestlers as well as entertainers. The buildup has been fantastic with Uncle Bret supporting the Champs, Miz forming an evil alliance with Jericho, and all hell breaking loose in Canada. I hope that the Hart Dynasty can retain the gold because they are a perfect face tag team. Strength, power, speed, technical skill, family heritage, beautiful valet, and natural appeal equal greatness. Unfortunately, no team can stop the momentum known as JeriMiz. Similar to the Montreal Canadiens losing in the championship series to the Flyers, the Hart Dynasty will crumble as Jericho breaks the walls down.

Winners: JeriMiz

Jack Swagger (C) vs Big Show
(World Heavyweight Championship)
Aizaz - The World Heavyweight Champion has been knocked out, RKO'd on Raw, driven through a table, lost to Kofi because of a distraction, had all of his trophies destroyed. There is absolutely no way Swagger loses to Show after suffering through all of that. Moreover, no one wants to see Show as the Champion even if they have done a decent job of building him as a face.

Predicted Winner - Jack Swagger

Johnny C - I will streak around Aizaz's hut if Big Show wins his 3rd WWE Heavyweight Championship.

Winner: The Swaggie

Aizaz - Dear Lord, please do not let Show win. No one wants to see John running around naked. Hell, the last 12 year old who saw him naked is traumatized, and is probably somewhere in therapy right now.

Edge vs Randy Orton
Aizaz - Both these guys are entertaining (even if Orton does overact to the umpteenth degree) and they have had some good confrontations leading up to the match. Their previous matches have been pretty good, so it will be interesting to see what kind of match they will have with Orton as the face and Edge as the heel. I will pick Orton to win, since Edge had the upperhand on Monday night

Predicted Winner - Randy Orton

Johnny C -RAW has been hotter ever since this feud has surfaced between the Apex Predator and the Rated-R Superstar. Must see matchup which is a rare one on one encounter between these two former partners. I'm not sure whether the feud continues; therefore, Orton hits an RKO for the victory. Definitely the match of the night.

Winner: Orton

Aizaz - This feud will continue, and both these guys will be part of the Fatal 4 Way for the WWE Championship on the next PPV.

John Cena (C) vs Batista

(WWE Championship)
I Quit Match

Aizaz - Same as the last PPV, Batista's contract expires pretty soon. In fact, I think will be his last match in the WWE. As a result, there is no way he wins the championship even if I would desperately like him to do so. For those who prefer to be optimists, there were some reports that there were a lot of last minute writing changes made to this PPV. Combine that with Cena screaming "I Quit" three times in his horrendous promo on Raw, and mayeb they will repeat the Royal Rumble spot where they played a pretaped recording of Manking saying "I Quit". Of course, I don't think it's likely to happen, but there is always the possibility of Batista agreeing to an extension.

Predicted Winner - John Cena

Johnny C - Anticipating Batista's finale. Plus, WWE usually delivers on the I Quit matches. John Cena will undoubtedly overcome the odds once again, but beware of a certain Celtic Warrior awaiting the opportunity to strike.

Winner: John Cena

Aizaz - Hopefully, there won't be any duct tape involved.

CM Punk vs Rey Mysterio
(Hair vs SES Pledge Match)
Aizaz - If I were actually watching this PPV, this would be my most anticipated match Punk and Mysterio have had some solid matches in this feud, but they haven't had that classic that I thought they would. If they give them enough time, and don't overbook it, I think the awaited classic might occur tonight. I expect Punk to win since Mysterio got the upperhand on Friday Night, and if Mysterio potentially joins the SES things will be much more interesting on Smackdown. I think the Masked member of the SES will end up swinging it for Punk, and int he process will either unmask or be forced. A dark horse candidate for interference might be the recently eliminated Darren Young, who might save Punk's hair and shave his own.

Predicted Winner -CM Punk

Johnny C - The feud of the year so far will continue as Rey joins the S.E.S. due to interference by the mysterious masked man.

Winner: Punk

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